Nordstrom's Girl

OK.  First, you have to understand that a Nordstrom's catalog has been tossed onto our couch.  The cover features a young model in a black bikini.  Her skin is smooth and her long and lustrous brown hair blows in the wind.  She looks exactly like me.   

So yesterday I get an email telling me my journal might be featured on AOL's Diet and Fitness programming screen.  The catch?  They want a photo.   Now do you believe for a second that a woman who is writing about her efforts to lose weight wants her photo plastered all over America so that her friends from years past can, um, issue sorrowful and sympathetic but secretly relieved commentary?

I don't think so.

I tell my daughter that I was going to be famous, but the photo thing is a deal-breaker.  She looks at me in amazement.  "Just use someone else's," she says.  This time it's my turn to be surprised.  She's in high school.  Plagiarize a whole other person?  "Sure," she responds.  She picks the Nordstrom's catalog off the couch.  "Here," she says.  "Use this one!"

So there you go, AOL.  You already have my photo.  It's on the cover of the Nordstrom swimsuit catalog. What more could you possibly ask?

Walked: 3 of the slowest miles ever -- it was beyond hot this afternoon.